build you up tear you down

i'm still a child who can see the world in a thousand different ways. Reason the world in a thousand different ways and end up dizzy and disorientated; dumb without words to describe how I feel or what I see. Saw. And there's always more and more...

Collide. Scope. Collide. Scope.

I snatch at meanings and try and pin them to my emotions. Box them. My fears get the better of me until I push them away in defiance. Stupid me. Stomping on them as if they will go away. Instead I'm just firming the ground above them so they can germinate. Into?

So, they need to be unearthed and exposed. Until they evaporate. And I release myself.

It's here. My freedom. I can see it but not have it. Because I am fears. Because I am dumb. I need to teach myself the language of releasing. I need to forget the words I've been tought.